-Did you pass the test?

There is an unspoken test that we all have to take everyday. It starts when we wake up and we put our pencils down when we lay down to end our day. There is no way to study for it, there is no way to cheat on it, there is no secret acronym to help you pass it, and there is no way of rescheduling. Usually we don’t even get to see our score. Everyday is a test of whether or not we follow the rules and stay inside the lines. There are so many rules and laws put on us and so many that we have to memorize and learn that we are all lawyers. Harvard looks like kindergarten compared to everyday life. There are rules when we buy our groceries; let the person with fewer items go ahead of you. Rules for buying clothes; never go shopping by yourself, it will end badly. Rules for speaking; if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all, only talk when spoken to first, and kind words attract kind people. Then of course there is the golden rule; we speak English in America. Okay. So that is not the “golden rule”. The real golden rule; safety and courtesy never take a holiday. This is a mere sampling of what we are supposed to follow and abide by everyday. How can we be expected to remember things like birthdays, wedding anniversaries, due dates, lunch dates, the annual sale at Barney’s and what time we are suppose to pick grandma up from the airport if we are all preoccupied with making sure we are following the rules. We have rules placed on us by society, the judicial system, and ourselves. But, let’s be honest, we almost always break the rules we put on ourselves. I will not buy that pair of jeans; now there are two pairs in your closet. I will not have another drink; you woke up in a stranger’s bed. I will not go to YouTube or Facebook while doing homework; we all fail at that one. I will not pick up my phone; now you’re listening to your sibling complain while reading this. I will not stay in this relationship; are you still in the relationship?
The rules of a relationship actually start way before the relationship is even thought of. We have rules of attraction, which if followed correctly will bring you to the next level; the rules of dating. If the rules of dating are not broken then you get to the rules of exclusivity and, if you are lucky enough to pass that back sweat inducing exam, you finally arrive at the rules of a relationship. Hurray and good for you; your life is now nothing but hugs and puppies. If you are able to follow all the rules, which are innumerable, unwritten and made up on the spot sometimes; why do we fear being single? Anyways. There are rules like the “zip code rule”, the “spring break rule”, the “work spouse” rule, the “it was only once rule”, the “I-was-too-drunk-to-rememb

er-rule”, and the infamous “We-were-on-a-break-rule”. Stupid Ross. And since the judge we have to face is the other person in the relationship and the jury tends to be their best friends, we usually end up screwed. Do we follow the rules because they are there, or because we want to? The rules do provide stability, even if they suck. We should follow some rules, since we do tend to break our own all the time; but does it make sense to let someone else’s rules dictate our relationships?
For the most part, we all have a general consistency when it comes to the rules. Even if we never speak of them or mention just how powerful they are. They are there to give some structure and some rough lines. The rules are to life what the green straw is to a Starbucks drink; understated, quietly powerful, only noticed when it’s gone and needed to make it complete.